paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
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