Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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