I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Randomize
