Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Randomize
