She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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