so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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