Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
