Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
