i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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