So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
