i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
