Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
