I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
