ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
