I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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