I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
