i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Randomize
