Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
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