like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize