um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
