just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
