well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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