I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
