drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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