too bad you live with your parents still
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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