im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize