I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Randomize
