What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
