when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
