I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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