i need an iv and a liver transplant
We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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