God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
