Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
