ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
