i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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