Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Never let your siblings swipe right.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
