i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
