you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
The Olympian is in my bed
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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