Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
