She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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