2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
