I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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