last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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