I'm lost and stupid without you.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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