that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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