Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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