He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Randomize
