its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize