yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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