garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
